Monday, I was off the pain medications and ready to start moving around. By Tuesday, I was in horrible and constant pain. Bryan had to return to work and I continued to grow worse instead of better. Yesterday, I returned to my doctor to have an ultrasound and blood work done. When my doctor pressed on my left side I nearly jumped off the table. My white blood count is slightly elevated but I still don’t know why I am in so much pain. He said he could have nicked something but won’t get a CT until we get all the results back.
I think that since I have been a caregiver for many years now, I would learn to take my own advice. I was always telling Bryan to take it easy, take your pain medications and rest. However, when you are a caregiver there is no time for rest. At the moment, my house is covered in dog hair, there is no food in my fridge and my husband has ordered us pizza three times this week.
I need to go to the grocery but standing up for more than five minutes is painful. If I send Bryan he will end up with nothing on the list and a bunch of sweets. I have slept so much in the last week that I barely know what day it is. I frankly don’t have time for this. My work has been put on the back burner. I don’t want to ask anyone for help as they have busy lives too.
As a caregiver, wife and employee I just don’t have time to be down. I am not recovering like I should from this surgery. I often wonder why I am the exception to the rule. I am thankful that I have a diagnosis but I may have to undergo these surgeries every year now. Bryan doesn’t really know what to do so he goes to the basement when he gets home and I call him if I need something.
How do you handle being out of your normal role to care for yourself when your warrior needs help with things too?